gotta learn to like my new fate

oh well, the past few weekdays leading to the end of my Basic Section Leader Course (BSLC) have been heavy hearted. No it wasn't because i miss SISPEC or Tekong (oh no am I?) but the fear that i could be posted back to SISPEC again for the Advanced Section Leader Course (ASLC), which means i would have been an infantry specialist. I'm no action-man and charging around with six men under you isn't something i have aptitude for. The thought that i would be doing that makes me shudder, but in hindsight, that now seems nothing compared to what i may be going through...more on that later.

So as our sergeant read out each posting destination, followed by the names that would apply to, my heart pounded increasingly harder. For each name that was read that was not mine meant a greater chance of getting stuck on this island. Some lucky souls got sent to the airforce! Some were sent to the Unmanned Aerial Vehicle Training Centre (UAVTC), and i was disappointed i wasn't among them. I was posted to the school of armour instead. That left me quite affected, though i struggled to give myself a feeling of relief that i wasn't sent for ASLC. well its not that bad i told myself, tanks played a rather interesting role in the second world war, and besides its probably going to get more interesting than that regular infantry business. Yesterday i found out that things just got 'better'...or worse.

Of the Mortar Commander's Course, Tank Commander's Course and Armoured Infantry Section Leader's Course (AISL) , i was posted to the lattermost. What a blow as i saw the guy slide his ruler down the very long namelist to reach mine, and spotted the acronymn AISL. I looked at it a second time with disbelief, before the guy told me so. Then i was scolded by an old man who turned out to be the course warrant officer for smiling. i'm still quite bewildered, but i think he probably mistook my smiley nature for a lack of seriousness.

I felt a little better after having an early lunch with my friend, but emotions slid all the way while i spent the rest of the day at the library, then at Kinokuniya, and then at my aunt's place, where i managed to pick myself up and am still clinging precariously onto this fairly stable emotional state, which always threatens to give way to the depths of emotional hell.